Is It Okay to Talk About This?
It's Scary to be Vulnerable and Authentic
If you’ve been reading my work for quite some time, you might remember me for my personal stories. Authenticity and vulnerability are words that I’ve often heard people use to describe my writing.
To be honest with you, though, there are times that I want to share something about myself but I hesitate because I worry about how it will be perceived.
One of those things is my faith as a Catholic.
Is it okay to talk about this?
I’m aware that Substack is an international platform and my audience comes from different religious and cultural backgrounds.
Every time I try to mention my faith, I get nervous about how other people would respond. (This is how I’m feeling right now as I’m writing and editing this 🥲)
Is this too personal?
Will some people be offended?
Will people cringe and hit ‘unsubscribe’?
I’m scared but I’m posting this anyway because they say the scarier it is to hit ‘publish,’ the more you should probably do it. Chances are, someone out there is struggling with the same problem and they, too, are hoping to find someone who understands them.
If this person is you, I hope you feel less alone after reading this. 🤍
Why do I want to open up about my faith?
Faith has played a significant role in my life and it shaped who I am today.
As I shared in a previous post, the very first self-help books I read when I was a teenager were the works of Bo Sanchez, a Filipino Catholic lay preacher and motivational speaker (and my mom’s favorite author). He’s also a successful entrepreneur who makes use of the wealth he generates from his businesses not to live a lavish lifestyle, but to fund his ministries and help more people.
I’ve read hundreds of self-help books but very few of them were as life-changing for me as the works of Brother Bo. His books completely changed the way I viewed my relationship with God, with others, and with myself.
Not only did I grow spiritually, but I also learned about financial literacy, how to have an abundance mindset, how to overcome my fears, insecurities, and limiting beliefs, how to stop people-pleasing, and how to truly love and serve others.
I love psychology and philosophy—I’ve learned so many useful ideas from these fields of study, but faith and spirituality have also given me indispensable value in my self-growth journey.
It doesn’t feel right not to talk about my faith because it feels like I’m not giving credit where credit is due, and it’s as if I’m keeping a huge secret all to myself when sharing it can positively impact another person.
How Faith Helped Me Grow as a Person
I’m a very timid person.
Believe it or not, my family would even describe me as someone who’s “afraid of people” because whenever I hear the doorbell, I almost always panic and hide in my room to avoid interacting with visitors.
(Yes, that’s how shy and introverted I am in person 😭)
When I was a kid, I even said that I never wanted to go to a big university—I would only attend a small college because university life isn’t for me—the thought of studying at a big campus with thousands of students intimidated me.
Who would’ve thought that years later, I’d end up studying at one of the top universities in our country with an academic scholarship?
Not only that, I even started building an audience as a content creator after graduation!
Where did a person like me with so many fears and limiting beliefs find the courage to go out of my comfort zone?
It wasn’t through self-help or professional therapy—it was mostly through faith and prayer.
When I had such low self-esteem and self-confidence as a teenager, how did I even think of applying for a scholarship at one of the top universities in our country?
I felt scared and unworthy, but I trusted in God’s plan for me and I had faith that wherever He would lead me, He would provide for my needs.
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding;
In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths.”
— Proverbs 3:5-6
The secret behind my success as a student wasn’t that I’m smart and hardworking—that’s only 1% of the equation. 99% of the credit goes to God and the blessings he has given me throughout my journey.
It’s hard for a lot of people to believe this—they think I’m just humble-bragging, but if you really knew me as a person beyond the grades and medals, you’d understand why I say this.
For me, becoming a scholar at my university and graduating with Latin honors were all miracles from God. Whenever I look back on my ‘success story’ as a student, I get emotional because my younger self never could have imagined these things could be possible for me.
Many times in my life, I just want to play small, be invisible, and stay in my comfort zone, but I keep feeling that God is calling me to do more.
“Maybe God has a bigger plan for me than I had for myself.”
— Jamie Sullivan, A Walk to Remember (2002)
I learned from Brother Bo that I shouldn’t dream small and only think of myself. I have to dream bigger and ask how I can become a blessing as well to others.
Playing small is not only a disservice to myself but also to the world.
“Receive all the blessings that God wants to give you.
Don’t limit God’s abundance.
Because that abundance is not just for you but for others!”
— Bo Sanchez
What am I really afraid of?
If there’s something important that I’ve learned, it’s that fear is self-centered—whenever I’m operating from a place of fear, I’m thinking about myself, not others.
I realized that behind my fear of offending others lies a more selfish motive:
The need for acceptance.
I’m scared that people will judge me and not accept me for having different beliefs.
But recently, I’ve been watching videos of creators such as Omar Eltakrori and Rory Vaden, and hearing them openly talk about their faith inspired me.
The beautiful thing about being your authentic self
is that it empowers others to do the same.
I love learning about other cultures too and it would be great to hear from people from different religions and atheists if they want to share their own perspectives and engage in friendly dialogue.
I want this to be a safe space where we celebrate our diversity and uniqueness.
Maybe there are people out there who think that religion, faith, and spirituality are stupid and they judge and hate people who believe in these things… but I’m not here to change their mind or win their approval.
I’d rather have fewer subscribers who accept me for who I am than millions who expect me to be someone I’m not.
I want to build a community of people who are open-minded, respectful, and kind—people who won’t judge you and will be willing to listen, even if you're different; people who can find common ground and similarities beyond surface-level differences.
“Be who you are and say what you feel,
because those who mind don't matter,
and those who matter don't mind.”
― Bernard M. Baruch
✨ Alea’s Cabinet of Curiosities
🎬 Film
A Walk To Remember (2002)
This is one of my favorite movies of all time 🥹💖 My older sister recently played the film’s soundtrack and I was instantly hit with nostalgia 🥲
I usually have a terrible memory when it comes to movie plots, but I still vividly remember almost everything that happened here—that’s how much I loved it 🥺
It’s fitting to mention this movie because the story aligns with what I’ve just shared in this post.
Landon Carter is a rebellious teen who often gets into trouble while hanging out with his popular friend group in school. They break rules and pick on other students, including Jamie Sullivan—the reverend's daughter who always wears the same sweater, eats lunch by herself, and is a 'goody-two-shoes' always carrying around a Bible.
After a particular incident lands him in trouble, Landon is required to participate in Saturday tutoring and the spring play, both of which Jamie is involved in. He starts getting to know more about Jamie and something about her unsettles and intrigues him: how she doesn't care about other people's opinions and stays true to her values. He, on the other hand, gives into peer pressure and goes against his better judgment just to look ‘cool.’
Inspired by Jamie, Landon starts changing for the better and finds the courage to stand by his convictions, no matter what others might say.
There’s a lot more to the story than I mentioned here, but I wanted to highlight this part because it addresses the problem that a lot of us face:
How do we stay true to our values in spite of peer pressure and the need for social acceptance?
It’s not easy, but remember that true friends and partners will love you unconditionally. They’ll inspire you and not hold you back from becoming a better version of yourself.
▶️ Videos / Podcasts
Level Up Your Personal Brand In 90 Minutes (Masterclass) ft. Rory Vaden | #TheDept Ep. 25 — Omar Eltakrori
How To Build A $1,000,000 Personal Brand (Detailed Breakdown) — The Futur
FULLTANK MONDAY: Dream Bigger Dreams And Pray Bolder Prayers — Bo Sanchez
✒️ Substack Reads
Just like with friendships in real life, quality is better than quantity when it comes to building your audience.
If you feel the need to hide yourself or put up a facade in front of your audience, are they even the right people?
What would it look like if you were surrounded instead by people you’re comfortable to be around?
Being vulnerable and authentic is scary, but how else can we build true connections and friendships?
Don’t build an audience—build a community.
Don’t look for subscribers—look for friends.
Don’t aim to be popular—aim to make a positive difference.
May we always stay true to ourselves and what we value,
If my newsletter has brought you value and you’d like to support me, the following would be a huge help:
Give this post a like, restack, and comment — I really appreciate your engagement with my posts and I love hearing from you too! 💖
Share and recommend my publication — If you know someone who would also gain valuable insights and inspiration from my work, please share the link below 😊
Give one-time or monthly donations through Ko-Fi — Support my mission of inspiring more creators to pursue their life’s work and make a positive difference in the world ✨
Thank you so much for your generosity and endless support! 🙏🏻💖
Thank you so much for sharing, Alea! Faith has also played a role in my journey, too, and I agree with the conflict between sharing it and suppressing it. But what I've learned is that even if I am afraid of what people may say — especially if I type a long Substack essay about it and have not told anyone in person — I should still put myself out there in hopes of somebody, even if it's just one person, finding that it makes a difference in their lives.
I completely understand the fear of overexposing yourself on the Internet and thinking you might regret it one day. Authenticity, though highly valued, is scary to put out there. Writing means giving a little piece of our soul away so it feels vulnerable. I feel you though not on a religious level. Either way, smart people would never judge you for what you write. Smart people would accept it and share those feelings